Get your man talking.

My husband is my best friend and that is
why I love any opportunity to chat and chat with him like best friends.

 Trust us " women "we like talking over everything and getting response most especially verbally.

Sometimes when l get those grunting replies and shrugging of shoulder as response to my yearnings for an active conversation and I get those manly attitudes l feel disappointed and fail to reason that my husband is not a female after all. I usually activate my "silent mode",put on my "am a woman cap"and wonder at the huge gender differences we have. "Sometimes it's like talking to yourself "commented a friend "All you get is a nod or just a grunt" Studies have shown men can actually talk unlike what "wives" think.
The issue is that most times we are always in hurry to be the one talking and also giving answers to issues on ground.
 Most men speak only about 12,000 words a day while most women speak over 25,000.So we can all imagine the huge gap in the words we dish out each day.

 Learning the key to making a long conversation with our husbands will promote the fondness and communication in our marriages.Men get fed up easily especially when we start our blabbing over issues and yet fail to respect their opinions. They just decide to keep mute and give us their noncommittal response as usual.
 Every woman should learn some basic things on how to motivate your husband to talk to promote the marriage.
 How Do You Motivate Your Husband to Talk? By Brian Bercht

 1. If you ask him a question, then allow him time to answer without explaining to him why he is wrong.

 2. If you ask him a question, then allow him time to answer without needing to point out to him why his answer doesn’t make sense.

 3. If you ask him a question, let him know you want to hear his answer by – not responding (cross examining) to the first thing that does not line up or what seems to contradict a previous answer.

 4. Let him know that you will hold your tongue and not interrupt his answers. He needs to feel some respect, and this is demonstrated by allowing him to complete his thought process.

 5. Give him the questions in writing.

 6. Use the phrases, ‘tell me more about that’; ‘that’s interesting, what allowed you to do that?’

 7. Avoid the ‘Entrapment’ questions. These generally are questions where you are trying to lead your man into saying what you think he SHOULD say. Styling or re-phrasing your questions in such a way to make him answer ONLY the way you think he should is the same.

 8. Give him time to think. Let him get the nerve up to answer. Allow him time to formulate his thoughts. (Remember, thinking about something DOES NOT mean he is lying!!!)

 9. Try to avoid asking the ‘FEELING’ questions. Like ‘how did you feel when you were doing…’ ‘What did you feel after…’ ‘How did it feel when she said…’ Because quite likely he wasn’t thinking about any of these things.

 10. Use the phrase, ‘I’d be interested to hear how you see…’ or

 11. ‘I know you don’t really want to but it would mean a lot to me, if you told me about…’

 12. If you have done this, then, admit that you have not really listened to him in the past. So really listen to his response to that statement.

 13. Don’t start these conversations late at night.

 14. Set a time limit on these talks and let him know what it is, and then stick to it!

 15. Try sticking to one subject at a time. Avoid jumping around.

 16. Remember he is not ‘rational & sound’ in his mind.

 Nafi's Random Musings@ www.nafisustain.com