The strength of a Mother.

“Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws.”

 Barbara Kingsolver

Photo credit:Facebook

Be Inspired

Searching through my archive of articles written by me and this caught my attention.


          BE INSPIRED. ....
I have heard lots of things of recent(both silly and
sensible ones),seen lots of funny characters
displayed by people that makes you wonder(what the
heck )and felt the impacts of selfless attitudes
towards the betterment of humanity(and get whoah )
In the midst of my random musings I learnt to pick
from the realities of life,because I have so many
thoughts bombarding me from all corners of my
brain.At a point I went blank from trying to judge the
reasons for my actions or rules and
regulations binding a cause.
Harmonising my own personal thoughts with every
thoughts triggered by what I have heard people say
about life,funny characters displayed by people that
makes you wonder "what the heck " or even the
selfless attitudes towards the betterment of humanity
has formed a complete lifestyle to my personal
development.Which formed the decision of
maintaining the great characters in me and
refining the ones that absolutely needs a
complete wash to become new.
Counting the little achievements I have made and
hoping to attain many more gives me lot's of joy
than feeling bad at myself.
Accepting my role as a mother and an educator
makes me buckle up at all my actions because l
have young minds mirroring my actions.I don't want
to misled the leaders of tomorrow.
Understanding the diversity of people attitudes and
the influences on their characters does not put me on
an edge when people act funny.
Inspiration from people with selfless contributions
towards a better humanity gives me the courage to
carry on too.
Disappointments,consequences of decisions
made,sacrifices made,happy and sad
moments,congratulatory times,quite and loud
moments and lot's more have harmonize my thoughts
to form my lifestyle and say to myself and everyone
around "that all is well"
Put a smile on your face no matter your condition.....
Fe eyin re

For more inspiring write-ups like this link on www.nafisustain.blogspot.com

Happy Independence Day..

It's another new day and the thought of making prayers for my fatherland NIGERIA. ...springs up.
With a hopeful heart,I aspire to see a greater days in the Nigeria.
To witness when basic amenities will no longer be manifestos for political posts.Would I be wishing for too much,if I pray to see Nigeria with corruption free citizens and good governance,political stability,unemployment rate reduced to 0%percent,a free era of ethics and religions differences conflicts, secured environment,food production,good road network,affordable housing scheme, e.t.c
Probably am on the asking for more mode (Oliver Twist mode)l am hoping for CHANGE MODE in every citizen of the Nation.
Let's join hands together to make our Nation a greater one....
Happy Independence Day.




“Nigeria is the Nigeria for Nigerians”

Great Parents Hear Things Their Children Are Not Saying.

       
      The most important thing in communication is
hearing what isn't said. - Peter F. Drucker

        Body language is a very powerful tool. We had body
language before we had speech, and apparently, 80%
of what you understand in a conversation is read
through the body, not the words. - Deborah Bull

Children love talking endlessly especially to their parents and get excited more when they see their parents showing a great interest in them.But chatting with our children can take loads of time and parents are usually busy attending to lot's of things that we tend to get carried away and fail to pay attention to our kids non -Verbal Communications. And so we say to them "please talk, am listening"and not bothering to look at them to see their non -Verbal Communications. 
    and so we miss alot of reaction and expression on them.
Whether you do that consciously or you don't realize
it's happening, contradiction between verbal and
nonverbal communication can lead to :
Irritation or
confusion or even
Mistrust
Paying attention to those contradictions is also a way
to uncover lies

Some Non -Verbal Communication Parents Should Take Note In Their Children

Facial Expressions
Facial expressions can alert a parent to so many
things. A baby who has a soiled diaper, a toddler who
has wet himself or a teen who is angry with the world
all can be revealed by the facial expressions they wear.
Looks of confusion or uncertainty can let a parent
know when something is unclear and countenances of
sadness or grief can send the signal to console a
bereft youngster. Without these clues, parents would
have a difficult time understanding the current status
of their children's heartfelt feelings as well as their
cries for attention and assistance.

Manerisms and Gestures
A crying baby who constantly pulls at his ears will
immediately be checked for an ear infection. A child
who continuously rubs his eyes may be indicating that
he is tired. A preschooler crossing his legs and jumping
up and down may need to use the restroom -- and
quickly. There are so many cues that a child gives his
parents on a day-to-day basis that it is important that
parents be alert to the message being sent so they can
properly care for their offspring.

Eye Contact
Eye contact is especially important with older children.
The manner in which they look at you can indicate
shyness, deceit, discomfort, or love. The ancient
proverb, "The eyes are the window to the soul," is
especially true in that so much can be read into the
visual exchanges between adult and child. A student
who loses his place during a show can gain immediate
confidence just from a teacher's look of
encouragement from across a stage. A child can see
when a parent's love shines from her eyes after a job
well done. A stern glance lets a youngster know when
he is in big trouble for an infraction.

Posture
When you ask your child how his day is going and his
response is "great" or "wonderful" but he is hunched
over and walking slowly with little or no energy, it is
highly likely that you will read his body language and
ask him what is wrong. A student walking straight and
tall through the front door on report card day is sure to
have exemplary grades. Posture can reveal so much
about how a child is feeling and what is going on in
his life and also how he feels about himself and his
body image.






Sources:
Conscious Communication
LIVESTRONG.COM
Our every day life

CHILDHOOD ATTACHMENT

CHILDHOOD ATTACHMENT

 Attachment in children is "a biological instinct in which proximity to an attachment figure is sought when the child senses or perceives threat or discomfort. Attachment behaviour anticipates a response by the attachment figure which will remove threat or discomfort". Attachment also describes the function of availability, which is the degree to which the authoritative figure is responsive to the child's needs and shares communication with them. Childhood attachment can define characteristics that will shape the child's sense of self, their forms of emotion-regulation, and how they carry out relationships with others.Attachment is found in all mammals to some degree, especially nonhuman primates. Why is it important to form a secure child- parent bond in early childhood? It seems intuitive that a secure child-parent bond is important for survival and development. Research shows just how real those benefits are to children: They are better able to control their negative emotions in stressful situations. They develop better social competence, learn to match feelings with words in dealing with what’s happening around them, and they are less liable to develop internalizing and externalizing behaviour problems. They are more confident about exploring the world around them. They learn through their parent’s caring behaviours to have a sense of worth, and to empathize and cooperate with others. These social skills help them to form strong relationships with peers in the future. Sources: Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development Wikipedia

We want great leaders of tomorrow.

We want leaders that will give back to the society,we want leaders and youths with a sense of humanity.
We want children who will show compassion for others and  understand the plight of people.


But we forget that we are lacking in our duties and responsibilities to instil in our children...leaders of tomorrow these basic principles of life.



What attitude as parents do we have for our kids to emulate.
What has the school curriculum taught these leaders of tomorrow about community services.
And what example as the society shown to them to make children have human feelings?



This is all about everyone.
It's high time we start engaging our children in active community service development.Once our children are involve in giving back to the society it becomes part of their personal development.

We don't need to start preaching when they become adults.They are already impressing us because they are giving back to the society because it has become an integral part of their character.



Then,in the nearest future we shall start to have youths and leaders who will have a mentality of making sure that each of their jurisdiction is adequately taken care of according to their capabilities.

I foresee a kind of future where aspiring leaders will come to manifestos and political debates with a portfolio of the services to humanity they have rendered and not "When I become. ........... l will construct roads,l will build schools and so on like we hear in our present day.



God Bless Nigeria!!!



Nafi's blog@ www.nafisustain.com

Tips on when couples disagree on parenting style.

 When couples disagree on parenting skills.


As parents we aspire to make our kids greater than us.Ensuring this entails lot's of parenting skills. Sometimes we may want to address issues or discpline our kids in our own style but usually have our spouses not agreeing to our style parenting.
As couples we are not the same individual,there is bound to be a disagreement in agreeing to a kind of parenting style.Our upbringing, exposure,environment we grew up and beliefs influences our styles of parenting.
Mummy might like talking one on one with the kids while Daddy likes the firm hand with the kids.
Definitely couples with differences will argue over how to discipline their children.Most couples have opposite qualities which attracts each other . Unfortunately
these very qualities that pull us together often become those that threaten to push us apart.Things will be fine if parents can use the following guidelines and agree at a point the kind of parenting style they want for their kids.

*Couples should back-up each other decisions.

*Make each other look good. Both daddy and mummy should be the great guy to their kids.


*Talk about the kind of parenting style you both want when you are both calm and in a good mood.


*Agree to a particular style of parenting style different issues.


*Make your child understand the reasons why "dad" or "mum" is taking a decision and don't paint your spouse bad in front of your child.


*Get information on your spouse's upbringing, the environment they grew up and their beliefs to understand their points and know how deep their feelings are  on parenting . Because these points influences and affects our reasoning as parents.


*Avoid getting into an argument but rather try and stay calm and listen to each other.


*Take a time out when things tends to get out of hand.


*Seek professional advice if you can't cope anymore.